So I ran across some hype about a new reality show to debut in mid-September titled Wife Swap. Now I hear that Fox just premiered a similar show July 20 called Trading Spouses. What is going on here? Excited as I was about the topic, it was a let down to learn that there would be no sex between the swapped partners. How in the world can anyone call that reality TV?
Nevertheless, here are the goods: Trading Spouses has swapped out 6 wives from different coasts and backgrounds, placing them each in a different house with different children and spouses. Each surrogate receives a $50,000 prize at the end of the series! This is similar to ABC's Wife Swap -- in fact ABC has complained that Fox pilfered their idea--except that there is no prize in the end. The creators of Wife Swap claim that the prize will be enlightenment from the separation that should result in a renewed awareness of why the couples married in the first place. We'll see what happens once the show is aired.
Hmm... still I would like to see the couples share a bedroom at least, but it is too threatening to mainstream at this point. However, the very idea of sharing a spouse at all is pretty avant-garde for prime time TV. Even though sexual relations are absent in this series, the basic premise for swinging is the same. If you share a spouse with someone else's family, your interest in your partner is renewed. Whether about the self or the other, each partner returns to the primary relationship with something learned. As a result the pair-bond is strengthened. Remember the old saying: "absence makes the heart grow fonder." And if you're sharing your partner with another household, why not share your partner for sexual activities? But reality TV isn't there yet, so it looks as if we are granted only the insinuation of swinging.
However, I'm suspicious of the TV producers' and executives' intent to market a show in this fashion, only to hint through the show's title at trading a spouse for recreational sex. Apparently the ratings were pretty high for the premiere, but viewers were expecting more. Nevertheless, the show is staying strong; Fox has even ordered 10 new episodes. And why wouldn't viewers want more? Sharing a spouse with another person for recreational purposes entices us, especially if our lives suffer monotony.
Most people have only heard about swinging through urban legends. Swingers don't really exist in the mainstream world, just as any other alternative minority. Swinging is novel and scandalous, and people want to participate without the responsibility. That's why television is so popular. It's safely vicarious.
Perhaps a reality show like this had been created to test viewer responses. Would the concept of real swinging avert audiences and/or cause some sort of consumer backlash? Controversy boosts TV ratings. And there are plenty of shows that feature alternatively sexual characters and themes: Will and Grace, Ellen, and Roseanne. Granted most shows only feature an episode portraying a sexually alternative couple or individual, such as Everybody Loves Raymond. But why not a series explicitly about swinging?
Is the mainstream so fettered in its social morality that it couldn't possibly stand an introduction to non-monogamy? And I think that's just it -- the shows and sitcoms that feature sexually alternative themes, the characters are considered to embrace the notion of monogamy. In the Raymond episode, and even in the reality show, the idea of swinging only operates to reinforce the illustrations of monogamous relationships.
So it seems as if television is okay with openly representing gays, lesbians, and interracial couples for what they are, but not swinging couples or singles. It has nothing to do with the sexual preference of the individual, but everything to do with the sexual philosophy within the individual. Non-monogamy is just too risqué of a subject for television producers and executives to explore. Perhaps that's the true purpose behind these misleading titles; it's an experiment. And if they get the desired ratings, then we may see a shift. Maybe it's only a matter of consumer response before real spouse swappers get their own show.
